Why I became an Atheist. Part 2

The next part of my decision, to be an atheist, isn't easy to put into words. It was a process of accumulated life experiences.

My daughter has a degree in anthropology and religion. We talked many times about other choices for me. She was aware that my feelings toward Christianity had become quite hostile. With her guidance, I continued my search. There had to be something for me to believe in.

During these years, I watched many documentaries on cable. Often, my husband (a history buff & Catholic school graduate) would comment on discrepancies between documented history and biblical history. I started, for the first time, putting some thought and research into these matters. I was shocked to realize I'd never had any independent thoughts or questions about religion. But, I knew I could no longer follow what I'd been taught growing-up. What I'd been taught was to follow along and do what was "right", not how to think.

I started looking into atheism and began reading books by current day atheists. One of my favorites is The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins. The more I learned about things that were misrepresented, distorted and similar to other religions, the easier it was to question the validity of all religions.

In my opinion, most people would turn away from religion if they were exposed to the truth about how today's version of the bible came to be. But the response of many (particularly evangelicals) when presented with thought provoking questions is, "If its in the bible, then its true." end of discussion.

For these reasons, and others, I became an atheist.

My parents (Part 1), who were so afraid my husband would turn me into a Catholic, are not aware that he helped turn me into an atheist.

Why I became an Atheist. Part 1

First, a little history. I grew up in a typical mid-western family-dad, mom and 2 sisters. My mother's family are Baptists. My mom, sisters and I attended Sunday school every week but didn't stay for church services. My father was not a Baptist, he wanted his family home on Sundays.

Even as a child I never felt comfortable in religious settings. Was it because I was looked down on for my father being a sinner or because at a young age I already knew better?

I followed this practice because I had no say in the matter. But moving to another town put me in control of my life and I stopped attending. Had you asked me if I still believed and was a Baptist, the answer would have been yes. I had never been exposed to anything else.

Fast foreword to my getting married. My folks were furious. Not only was I going to marry a Catholic but was also pregnant. I specifically remember my mom asking what I would tell this child once it was old enough and knew the truth. It was a very tough time. What helped me through it was the fact I was living in another state.

In respect to my parents, I must explain that they were familiar with the "old" Catholic church and had seen families torn apart because the church assumed they "owned" any children conceived in a mixed marriage.

To our heart wrenching misfortune, our baby was full-term and still born. Oh, I was angry with God. I felt I'd done the right thing by getting married and having the baby. I could've chosen a legal abortion. Yet God had the meanness to let our baby die. To me, God was saying: You are not a good or worthy enough person and need to be punished. You can't imagine the rage that existed in me for many years. We went on to have two more children. The pressure of keeping them safe, because I felt responsible for the loss of our first baby, eventually culminated in a breakdown.

Purpose

The purpose of my blog is to provide non-believers a safe place to express themselves. I'll discuss, what I feel are, inconsistencies in believer's line of thinking. And compare the similarities between the christian story and that of other world religions. I look foreword to hearing from you.

(This blog is not for endless debating of science vs. religion.)